Murderball: Massacring Misconceptions–

Murderball: Massacring Misconceptions

The quad rugby doc that changed how I thought about disability

Wanna watch Murderball? Stream it legally on Philo or Or use your library card on Kanopy. Youtube also has multiple full copies of it up.

Here’s a TL;DR up front: If you’ve never seen Murderball, go watch Murderball. It’s a hell of a sports saga about quad rugby (murderball) teams, international rivalries, and competition at the highest levels. It’s also a human story about people who have been through some shit... and come out the other side with pride, self-confidence and the desire to slam into others in an armored chair. The quote below, from a many-year veteran of the sport, sums it up best:

Text on yellow background: "The critics got one thing wrong: Murderball doesn't dispel myths and stereotypes.  It takes big fat bites out of those sugary sweet, pathetic images and stereotypes, chews 'em up and spits 'em out. It's not a magic pill that will make pity and stereotypes go away, but it is quite simply the best film ever made on disability.  It amazes me that these filmmakers were able to render such an honest portrayal of living life from the seat of a wheelchair.  Somehow, either by the sheer exposure to the people or by some innate understanding, directors Henry Alex Rubin and Dana Adam Shapiro "got it," and this film is a joy to watch, especially the way we did, with family and about 12 other quads. This movie is funny. It is sad.  It is fiery, fast, frank, explosive, sexy, tender, loving, and the action is bone-jarring, just like quad rugby, aka Murderball. - Ed Hooper"
Read Hooper’s full review here.

Killing it on the court

What even is the game of murderball (aka Quad Rugby)?

Quad rugby, originally called murderball, is a sport for people in wheelchairs who don’t shy away from, well, anything. It’s a weird mish-mash: played on a basketball court, with rugby-like interaction, using a volleyball and end zones like a football field.

paralypian mark zupan on the murderball court (credit MTV films)
Mark Zupan on the court

“The chairs look like tricked-out bumper cars, with bucket seats, safety harnesses, angled wheels, and grills to protect the feet. When they roll over, the guys go with them,” explained the film’s producer Dana Adam Shapiro

The rules go like this: four players on a side, ranked on their mobility on levels from .5 to 3.5, depending on their ability to move their upper bodies. Team mobility rankings cannot exceed a total of eight, so teams have to find a balance. “The most mobile players handle the ball,” said Shapiro. “The low-pointers act as human speed bumps.”

The documentary Murderball, disability theory and me

Promotional image of the DVD case for the film Murderball with the tagline "dream. believe. achieve."

Murderball came out in 2005 and in some ways, it really changed my life.  Today, between my freelance journalism, my work with the US Pain Foundation and my writing here on, I’ve spent the last few years pretty firmly in disability spaces. So it’s not easy to wrench my brain back to where I was in 2005. I was only beginning to learn to advocate for myself and constantly struggling with the idea of what qualified as “disabled,” or even just “disabled enough.”  I wasn’t in a wheelchair so it didn’t apply to me, right? With my life-warping invisible disability I didn’t fit in with the able-bodied, but there wasn’t a home for me in disability spaces either. (At least that’s how it felt.) And I certainly didn’t have anybody I could ask who had been through something similar.

Off the Court

Murderball is the opposite end of the spectrum: when most people picture “disabled,” they envision someone in a wheelchair who is paralyzed in some way, like the paraplegic and quadriplegic members of the quad rugby teams featured in the film. (Now one of the highest-grossing documentaries of all time!) But there’s more to it than what’s going on on the court. The film spends a lot of time showing the daily lives and routines of these men (and they’re all men), talking about how life has and hasn’t changed for them, in terms of health, sex, family, sport, and how they’re perceived. 

“One thing that’s cool, when you’re watching [Murderball] with an audience: People first start watching the movie, they see us as, ‘Oh my God, these guys are in wheelchairs.’ And then, it becomes, ‘Oh my God, these guys are in wheelchairs playing a sport.’ And then, finally when it’s over, they’re not seeing the wheelchairs anymore, they’re just seeing us as athletes.”

Seth Hogsett, Team usa

Abilities, Assumptions, and Attractions

Misconceptions swirl around these guys, mostly about what they’re capable of (answer: just about everything you’re capable of). The kind of life-changing accidents that the stars of Murderball underwent certainly affected their lives and how they grew and evolved as people. At the same time, those accidents don’t change who a person is at their core. These are guys who are athletes and thrill-seekers at their base. They found their way through the darkness of their medical trauma into a new life that they have to navigate.  If you’re an adrenaline junkie before breaking your back, an injury won’t change that. Murderball– quad rugby– is for THAT kind of paraplegic.  

“The guys we got to know get up earlier, exercise longer, eat healthier, travel more, get hotter girlfriends, and most of them can kick our asses,” said Rubin.

Front shot of Mark Zupan wearing headphones and using a quad rugby wheelchair
Mark Zupan training


One of the most… let’s say “engaging” parts of the film is a frank discussion of sex while disabled. They discuss everything from the social– how people beat around the bush (pun not originally intended) about the question of whether someone can get an erection– to the physical. They even go into different strategies for getting it on despite physical limitations.  (However, they also talk about playing up their limitations, “acting pathetic,” to get women. Which is… sad and gross and scuzzy. But some people are like that, sadly, and these are just people.)

And weighing risk

Unfortunately, quad rugby isn’t for everyone. It’s dangerous– these players are absolutely risking further disability. And only certain types of disabilities qualify to play. And chairs are ridiculously expensive. Coaches spoke of having to turn away many who were inspired by the movie but didn’t qualify to play. 

Head shot of Mark Zupan smiling in front of the USA olympics logo
Mark Zupan being interviewed

Deconstructing (Some) Defaults

How the film came to be, and the ways it changed the views of its able-bodied filmmakers, is an interesting story. First, editor Dana Adam Shapiro stumbled over a newspaper piece discussing the rivalry between two local quad rugby teams. I think many people would react the same way he did. He explained, “The article was pretty mind-blowing for me, because I had thought all quadriplegics were like Christopher Reeve — very mild-mannered and weak and fragile. Not playing this violent game and driving and having sex. I guess in my ignorance, I didn’t think quadriplegics would talk like that. And all of those stereotypes just started falling away.” 

“The premise sounded horrible,” admits Rubin. ”If there was a documentary about disabled people on TV, I’d want to switch the channel to CSI. But you meet these guys and they just completely subvert every cliché you’ve ever had about someone in a wheelchair. They listen to speed metal, they drink Jägermeister, they pop Viagra, they have hot girlfriends, they play poker, they call each other gimps and cripples. And Zupan, he’s a filmmaker’s wet dream. That guy is so brutally honest, there’s not a fake bone in his body.”

On a background of neurons, cover of the book "pain is really strange," text reads "graphic novels about pain," "pain is really strange, by steve haines, art by sophie standing,"
Want to learn in a fun way about what pain is and how it’s transmitted by the body? Check out my review of a cool graphic novel about chronic pain, “Pain Is Really Strange”

The Murderball MacGuffin

The action sequences are all Murderball but the heart of the doc is its characters and their struggles. “Quad rugby was this great MacGuffin that got you into the room and created this structure and was very visual,” explains Shapiro. He noted that there is only about nine minutes of actual sports footage in the 86-minute finished product. “But, at the end of the day, the story is hard to tell about what it’s like to break your neck.” 

New Limits In Old Rooms

Newly paralyzed Keith sees the condition of the bike he crashed
One of the most moving moments in the film is when newly paralyzed Keith Cavill sees the condition of the bike he crashed

One of the most compelling threads in the film is that of Keith, a newly paralyzed 20-something in the process of examining his new world and its limitations.

For me, the most moving bit had nothing to do with murderball at all. It was the scene where Keith comes home from the hospital for the first time, up the new ramps to the front door, into the room he’s now stuck sleeping in because he can’t go up the stairs to go to his own bedroom.

It’s a quick moment, blink and you’ll miss it, but it’s the most honest in the film. Keith looks around, obviously haunted by who he used to be, as his family tries to be optimistic. And he can see them trying, and he tries to be optimistic for them. But he breaks, clutching for perspective but breaking the way anybody who went from healthy to a serious disability knows too well:

“Preach all you want– it could have been worse– but what’s normal will never be the same.”

Keith Cavill, Murderball
"top 10 inspirational quotes about chronic pain and joy to motivate you through the new year and beyond"
Do you like Keith’s quote? I reference it in this new post about finding joy throughout your new normal, whatever that is.

Murderball is a way of making the best of that new normal.

For him, as for many others, quad rugby promised normalcy, competition, masculinity. It was one shining hope, a lifeline among the new limitations that would define the rest of his life. And it’s obviously not just the sport, it’s the people. It’s the community. And the understanding, both of the limitations of quad life and the desire to still take risks and experience thrills.

We don’t all have disabilities that let us have these experiences. But it’s impossible to watch and not feel that yearning, that passion, that drive to continue to compete and achieve physically. If you have a disability, this film and these characters will resonate. If you don’t, it will teach you something. Either way, it’s a hell of a film that I cannot recommend highly enough.

background clip art of two quad rugby players, text: "Massacring misconceptions, Murderball, the quad rugby doc that changed the way i thought about disability,

When I started, this post was going to be a fun quick recommendation of a great documentary I remember loving. As I got sucked back into it, I started thinking more about masculinity, normalcy, assumptions about sex, and the gross way that the dudes in this film go about “acting pathetic” to get women.

There’s been some fascinating work done by academics analyzing the film over the years since its release. And, well, I’ve ended up with a whole other post a-comin’ on that topic.

So while you watch, keep in mind a few extra questions. Like “what is normal,” “what is manly,” and “what other questions should these dudes be asking themselves once in a while?”

Are their social choices and actions, especially towards women, justified? Understandable? Scummy? Manipulative? A fair response to assholish cultural assumptions about sexual inadequacy? All these and more? I honestly have mixed feelings on the whole thing, and I’d love to hear your perspective.

All Murderball visuals I use in this post are thumbnails that were released as part of the official press pack. There’s no way to actually contact them anymore for actual permission / full quality images (trust me, I tried).

"murderball: massacring misconceptions, the quad rugby doc that changed how i thought about disability," beside a cartoon of a man in a wheelchair holding a basketball


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Hopefully this site will help you avoid some of the BS I’ve experienced over the last 20 years seeking treatment for my chronic pain, invisible illnesses & mental health challenges. Maybe it’ll even help you think about disability in a new way! But at the very least, I hope you learn something, and I hope it helps you feel less alone.



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